Monday August 21, 2017 02:44 am 
 
THE ‘MOD’ ATTORNEY-GENERAL

(with apologies to W. S. Gilbert)

AG

I am the very model of a ‘mod’ Attorney General,
I’ve information vegetable, animal and mineral;
I know the laws of England, and I quote the texts historical,
From Lyttleton to Halsbury in order categorical.
I know the rules of evidence, especially the ones on ink; (1)
I know that if I say a case is closed it's bound to raise a stink;(2)
And though I have detractors in the press,
(they're lurking everywhere) .
I'm not ashamed to go to court and show them my nice underwear. (3)
-

Chorus

He's not ashamed to go to court and show them his nice underwear etc.
-

AG

I run a large department full of lawyers and translators too;
I sometimes wonder if I'm dreaming and if I will soon come to.
I often go to LegCo. and explain my plan to localise; (4)
(But if the job is to be done I always have to compromise.)
I sit each week in ExCo. and advise on legal policy,
And if I want to have a thrill - I mention the ICAC. (5)
Then off I go to walk in the recesses of the Himalay,
Where I am not required to make a speech or visit the CJ.
-

Chorus Where he is not required to make a speech or visit the CJ etc.
-
AG

In fact, when I know what is meant by "SAR" and "PLA",
When I can tell at sight a man who works for the NCNA, (6)
When such affairs as LegCo. briefings I'm becoming wary at,
And when I know precisely what is meant by Secretariat;
When I have learnt what progress has been made within the JLG,
When I know more of tactics than a member of the NPC, (7)
In short, when I’ve a grasp of 1997 strategy,
You’ll say that I’m the person who’s exactly right to be AG.
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Chorus

You’ll say that he’s the person who’s exactly right to be AG etc.
-

AG

Now my legalistic knowledge, though I’m lucky and adventury,
Will only be required until 3 years short of the century;
But still, in matters vegetable, animal and mineral,
I am the very model of a 'mod' Attorney General.
-

Chorus But still, in matters vegetable, animal and mineral,
He is the very model of a ‘mod’ Attorney General.

Notes
1. The AG, Jeremy Mathews, was the main witness in a trial for assault against a man who threw a bottle of ink at him.
2. The decision not to prosecute Australian businessman Alan Bond for fraud was quite controversial.
3. The evidence in the assault case included the AGs ink-stained under garments.
4. Localizing of posts and localizing of British laws applied to HK.
5. The Independent Commission against Corruption made some controversial decisions during the period.
6. Special Administrative Region; People’s Liberation Army; New China News Agency.
7. Sino-British Joint Liaison Group; National People’s Congress.

 

Links

~ Prince Splendid and the Dream Machine
~ The Commencement Conundrum
~ The Law Draftsman's Song
~ Hush Hush
~ The "Mod" Attorney-General
~ To the Lancaster Jurors
~ Contrasts - the challenges of drafting in a developing country

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